The Brothers

My brothers are honestly the two funniest people on this earth. I'm not just saying that because they're my brothers. It's impossible to be around even one of them without laughing, but when they're together it is like watching a really funny movie. 

I'm so, so thankful for my brothers for that and for so many other reasons. They are both such kind, caring people.
They set such a good example for me and my sisters. They both chose, on their own, to serve LDS missions. Of course they knew my parents want them to serve missions, but they were never pressured into it at all but they still decided that is what they want to do. I'm so thankful for that example and I'm so proud of them!

Look how cute.. haha.

Jeremy served his mission in Riverside,California:

Matt just got his call to San Antonio, Texas:

I'm so proud of these guys. They're so awesome, and I couldn't have asked for better brothers & best friends.

Humbled.

My posts have all been emotional lately, I know. I'll write something normal soon- I promise. But this weekend was far too humbling and incredible for me not to write about. 

On Friday night, there was a viewing for Cody. All week I had been planning on going because I couldn't make it to the airport when his body was flown in, which made me really sad. I went out to my car on Friday to go the viewing and I had a flat tire. I was so frustrated because I was already in a hurry to get there, and it was so important to me to go. One of my neighbors came outside and put my spare tire on my car, it was so nice! I was so relieved. Then I called Big O Tires and they said they were closing in just a minute. I asked if they knew if any other places were open, and they said that most places close at the same time. Then he said that he could wait and fix it for me when I get there. So I took my car and the employees stayed like 20 minutes late to fix it for me! I was so happy about their kindness! I went to the viewing, it was at his family's house. It was so cool to see the memorial his Dad set up for him outside their home!

They also had all of his awards that he's earned in the army set up at their home. He is such an honorable man. The other thing I was so happy to see was that there were guards standing next to his casket at all times! That shows so much respect to Cody, and that's exactly what he deserves. I'm glad our army shows so much respect to our fallen soldiers. 

There were flags leading all the way from the freeway exit to the Towse's house in honor of Cody. There were signs on businesses that said things about Cody and him being a hero, and there were flags lowered the entire way. It's all just so awesome to me! 

Saturday was the funeral. That was a rough day, but I was lucky to have one of my brothers and one of my good friends (who was also good friends with Cody) with me. 

Holly & I look more alike than Matt & I do.. haha

It was a sad day (obviously) but also one of the most amazing and spiritual experiences I've had. There were so many people there to show support to Cody's family and show respect for Cody. It was seriously amazing listening to them talk about him and how thankful they are for his service. I can't remember exactly who said this, but one of the speakers said, "There's nothing more patriotic than a casket with an American flag draped over it." How true that is!

It was such a humbling experience hearing about what these men and women (in the army) will do to protect each other. These people out there fighting for their country and their fellow soldiers are so brave, I can't even imagine being so strong. Hearing letters written to Cody from his fellow soldiers and about experiences they had together were so genuine and full of love. A man came and spoke at the funeral, who was the uncle of a soldier who lost both of his legs and part of one of his hands in the same explosion that took Cody's life. It was said that this soldier was trying to help his fallen brothers when this happened. How brave and how amazing. And to think, over here we complain about being "tired" or having a cold. Ha! Our soldiers are special people that were definitely sent down here for a purpose. 

Cody's sweet mother got up and bore her testimony. I can't imagine the pain she must be going through, yet her testimony is still so beautiful and so strong. It was such a testimony builder to me to see the mother of a fallen soldier get up and speak about about her love for the Lord. She is a strong woman.

Cody's funeral was being broadcast for the other soldiers (and whoever else wanted) to hear. There was a time when one of his uncles got up to speak about the LDS church's beliefs, since not everyone listening knew what all of the things being said meant. He mentioned why we say that we will see Cody again. And I realized that not everyone knows they will see their family & friends again after something tragic happens. That breaks my heart completely. I am so thankful that we are blessed to know that we WILL see them again and that they are on the other side rooting for us and excited for our reunion. We are so blessed.

Seeing all of the fire trucks, motorcycles, and Ambulance following the car taking Cody's body to the cemetery was one of the coolest things I've seen. It's so good to know that he's being shown the respect he deserves.

Cody was an amazing person. He was so hilarious and sarcastic and he cared so much about people. It's no surprise that he left this earth in the most honorable and respectable way possible, trying to save another person. The memories of our friendship will serve as a constant reminder to me to try to be more like him, and show love and genuine kindness to all people. 

I love you, my friend! I am forever grateful to you for your service to our country and for our special friendship. The example you set for me and love you showed to me will forever be in my heart and mind.

Memorial Day

This Memorial Day is different for me than others have been. Today we honor all of the fallen soldiers, and it makes me think, we should be honoring them every day. It makes me upset at myself to think that I haven't always thought of Memorial Day as the extremely special day it is. I'm thankful for all of our soldiers- the ones who fought, who still fight, and who will fight for us. I can't even fathom the amount of strength and courage a person has to have to literally die for us. 

I see how many people have talked about Cody and lowered their flags for him, and showed appreciation for him and it shows me that he really is a true hero. I'm so thankful for him. It comes as no surprise to me that his life was taken while trying to save the life of another soldier. He has always been the kind of person to put others before himself, and not just his friends and family. To him, every person came before himself.

Today is a day for us to really think about the sacrifice they made for us. Cody and SO, SO, SO many other brave men and women died so we don't have to. They live their lives in fear every single day, so we don't have to. They truly give up everything they have, so we don't have to. I believe those people are all granted a ticket straight to heaven.

It truly humbles me to know that there are people in our country who are more than willing to put their lives on the line every day for complete strangers. 

I am so extremely grateful that I'm so blessed to live in this amazing country. We are free and we are safe, all because of the amazing people who love our country and its people so much that they sacrifice their entire lives for it.

I miss Cody so much, and these last couple of weeks have not been easy. But I am so thankful to him for all that he did for me, and for my family and for every other person in our country. He will always be remembered as a hero, because that's what he is.

I love this song so much. The chorus honestly gives me chills because it is so powerful. 

"I'm proud to be an American, where at least I know I'm free. And I won't forget the men who died, who gave that right to me. And I gladly stand up next to you and defend her still today, cause there ain't no doubt I love this land. God Bless the USA."

Soldier

This post is probably going to be really cheesy and emotional, so for the record, you've been warned! I'm writing it mostly for my benefit, but I wanted to get it all written down. On Tuesday, a good friend of mine was killed in Afghanistan. This news hit me so hard. I hear about soldiers passing away all the time, and I never really think about it more than just thinking, "that's so sad." This time, it hit me a little closer to home and I'll forever be more sensitive and thankful for our wonderful soldiers. Anyone who knows me, knows that at times I can be preeeetty dramatic. The thing I loved about Cody, was that he would sit there and listen to me be emotional, sometimes for hours, and just talk to me and never complain. When we first became friends a few years ago, I was having a lot of anxiety about other things and was really stressed out all the time. I mentioned to him once that I had a hard time sleeping at night, and after that for a month or two he would sit on the phone with me every single night until I fell asleep. I would wake up to my phone laying on bed, sometimes with the call time being 2 hours or more. I'm so thankful for that.. I can't imagine the amount of patience a person would have to have to do that. I wish I expressed my gratitude and love for our friendship to him a little more. Cody had the most sarcastic personality I have ever seen, and I loved it. He was SO funny and so much fun to be around. But it's crazy what you learn about a person when you have heart to heart talks nightly and while sitting in Partyland (where we worked and met)filling up balloons. He was actually a lot more than the funny guy, he was so sweet. He truly, truly cared for people. 

After a few months of friendship, he figured out that I loved baked potatoes, and I was working one night and he called and said he was picking me up from work. He did, and we ended up going to get baked potatoes.. it doesn't sound like a big deal, but I cherish that sweet gesture. 

I remember the first time he ever texted me, he called Partyland and asked one of my co-workers for my phone number. It was my 20th birthday and he texted me and said, "One more year until you can buy me beer." He didn't ever drink or anything, that was just his sense of humor. And I love that he sent that to  me before we even knew each other.. haha, who does that!

He would always text me when he was going to be working in the Orem store (the one I worked in) so I could hurry and switch my shift with someone and we would be able to work together. We had way too much fun together. One night we went to Arctic Circle for milkshakes, and there was a note on the napkin dispenser that said, "DO NOT take more napkins than you need!" For some reason we thought that was hilarious, so I took a picture and we continued to send that picture back and forth for about a year. Laughed every time.

Cody and I got in a few weird, random arguments about stupid things- I think mostly just for argument's sake, I assume because we're both stubborn. But every time he would later send me a text and say, "Hurry and text me, I'm sick of ignoring you." or "Sorry I annoyed you with my friendship." or something along those lines. They always made me laugh and I will really miss that.

He would always poke fun at me because I would call, text, or facebook message him every time I was upset. He joked about how I needed to start paying him to be my counselor! Haha. He and I got in one of our arguments a few months ago (right before he left for Afghanistan) and we didn't talk for about three months.. SO STUPID! But, the Lord loves us and he brings us exactly what we need when we need it. Recently I really wanted one of my "counseling sessions" from him so I emailed him on Facebook (no texting or calls to Afghanistan.) He responded to me and said, "Do you need a loan or something?" hahahaha! I could not stop laughing. But, I am more grateful than I could even put into words that I felt so upset and wanted to talk to him. Because we were able to make amends and our last couple of months were full of playful banter over Facebook. I am so thankful for that... what a blessing.

I realize this post is ALL over the place, and probably boring to most people. But I wanted to write down some of my favorite memories while they're still fresh on my memory.

So lastly, to end on a lighter note, one of my other favorite things about Cody:

HIS PERFECT TEETH! Are you kidding me? Look at those! I'm really going to miss this friend of mine, and his back-handed compliments, making me laugh like nobody else, counseling sessions, and genuinely kind heart. But I know he'll watch over me from up there just like he did down here. I'm so thankful to him and all of our other fallen soldiers who truly gave their lives for us. What an incredible gift.

New Goals

Since January 1st when I wrote my New Year's Resolutions, some things have changed- so I updated my goals. I wrote down my new goals and wrote down steps to accomplishing those goals. One of the things I've decided to do is add more things into my life that make me happy. I love my job, and I honestly love school (I'm weird.) But I needed other things to take up my time as well, like spending more time with my family and friends, going to the gym, going on runs, baking, etc. I've started doing all of those things and it REALLY does make a big difference.

It's so true that happiness really does come within. It is so vital to be happy with yourself and with your life, without leaning on someone/something else to make you that way. 

 

Happiness

Lately, I've been struggling with holding grudges and not being able to move past things that I feel are unfair or that cause me anger. I've been praying a LOT for help with patience and letting go of things I can't change. I have been able to find more and more things that help me when I'm stressed out or angry.. mostly reading, writing, working out and cleaning (the last one is weird, I know.) I feel like the last couple of days I've really been receiving answers. It's mostly obvious things that I've heard a hundred times, but now I'm ready to start applying them in my life. The first one was an article one of my friends posted on Facebook yesterday. It's called "22 Things Happy People Do Differently." It's full of great reminders, and I took screenshots of every page on my phone so I would always have access to the tips. Here is a link to the article:

http://successify.net/2012/10/31/22-things-happy-people-do-differently/

It is definitely worth reading. The next thing that really stood out to me came from a story that I've probably heard a hundred times. My brother was talking about the story of Jonah and the whale and he mentioned a scripture where God was talking to Jonah. The scripture is found in the book of Jonah 4:4 and it says, "Then said the Lord, Doest thou well to be angry?" In other words, it does us no good to be angry or to hold grudges. I need to keep that in mind when I start to sweat the small stuff.

I'm excited to start trying harder to apply all of these things into my life!

Blueberry 'French Toast'

Last night, me and these babes:

made dessert for our family. We made a really fattening and yummy version of blueberry french toast (found on Pinterest). All it is, is a package of cream cheese, 3-4 tablespoons of powdered sugar mixed together, smeared on bread, put fruit on top, and then cook it like a grilled cheese.

You can use any kind of fruit you want. We used blueberries and blackberries. It was so good! Of course, when we finished we covered them in more powdered sugar.

These are great, I highly recommend everyone try these!